Woody Allen
Sex is one of the nine reasons for incarnation. The other eight are unimportant.
George Burns
It isn't premarital sex if you have no intention of getting married.
George Burns
Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place.
Billy Crystal
According to a new survey, women say they feel more comfortable undressing in front of men than they do undressing in front of other women. They say that women are too judgmental, where, of course, men are just grateful.
Robert De Niro
Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.
Rodney Dangerfield
There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. So what's the problem?
Dustin Hoffman
There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL.
Lynn Lavner
Sex is one of the most wholesome, beautiful and natural experiences money can buy.
Steve Martin
My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch.
Jack Nicholson
Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope.
Camille Paglia
You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle-aged woman. Stuff you pay good money for later in life.
Elmo Phillips
It's been so long since I've had sex, I've forgotten who ties up whom.
Joan Rivers
There's very little advice in men's magazines because men think, 'I know what I'm doing. Just show me somebody naked!'
Jerry Seinfeld
Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship.
Sharon Stone
Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same.
Oscar Wilde
Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet.
Robin Williams
See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time.
Robin Williams
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